“...there was one morning when she appeared for breakfast in Mexican huaraches, Japanese silk pajamas with the sleeves rolled up--displaying a piece of adhesive tape where she had cut herself shaving her forearms--blue horn-rimmed reading glasses, and for earrings a cluster of tiny golden bells that tinkled whenever she moved. She might have gotten by this morning except for the fact that as she ate she steadily relaxed and contracted her feet so the huaraches creaked.
‘Now see here, you lady,’ Mrs. Bridge said with more authority than she felt, as she dropped a slice of bread into the automatic toaster. ‘In the morning one doesn’t wear earrings that dangle. People will think you’re something from another world.’
‘So?’ said Ruth without looking up from the newspaper.
‘Just what do you mean by that?’
‘So who cares?’
‘I care, that’s who!’ Mrs. Bridge cried, suddenly very close to hysteria. ‘I care very much.’” (58)
“‘Think what would happen if it fell over ker-plunk and hit you square on the head,’ she continued, ruffling his hair, and reflecting automatically that he needed another haircut.’ (61)
“..the hour was approaching when she must begin to reason with him as an adult, and this idea disturbed her. She was not certain she was equal to it.” (62)
“All her life she had been accustomed to responding immediately when anyone spoke to her.” (63)
“Mrs. Bridge understood now that she would never see very much of him. They had started off together to explore something that promised to be wonderful, and, of course, there had been wonderful times. And yet, thought Mrs. Bridge, why is it that we haven’t--that nothing has--that whatever we--?” (64)
“‘Why on earth do you think I’m here if I don’t love you? Why aren’t I somewhere else? What in the world has got into you?’” (69)
Mrs. Bridge responds habitually to everything around her. She does not think when she confronts Douglas about the guest towels and Ruth about her eccentric outfit, rather, she reacts intensely and emotionally. She is juxtaposed with an automatic toaster. She is scared with the prospect of trying to reason with Douglas. Why is Mrs. Bridge so averse to thinking for herself? Is she too conditioned by society, by her parents? Does she not have the capacity to really think for herself? Why is it, when she feels doubts about her marriage, she cannot even form coherent questions?
Mrs. Bridge’s family is central to her life, but she seems often unable to control her children and communicate with her husband. So, does her husband really love her? Does Mrs. Bridge really love her kids? Alternatively, answer this: why do you think she married Walter Bridge? She thought she could get away without marriage before, what did the “unremarkable” Walter Bridge have to offer her that changed her mind? Answer both questions if you want to.
Also, small excerpt from the plot synopsis of Tobacco Road (the novel) shamelessly taken from Wikipedia: "Possibly they realize that their way of life is already dead; thus their primary concern becomes not the preservation of that life but its appearance during burial."
1. I think Mrs. Bridge has been conditioned by her society. Her whole life (seemingly until she has children) she has been surrounded by people who follow the path that they observe from those around them. Judging from Mrs. Bridge’s obsession with how her actions and looks are perceived, the role models in her life likely also prioritized appearances and conformity. I think all this focus on conformity lead Mrs. Bridge to not consider her own emotions and thoughts very deeply until this point. She was so caught up in keeping up with what she thought she was supposed to do, she would just brush off any wayward thoughts she had. Now, we are seeing some of those boundary-pushing thoughts come to the surface, and Mrs. Bridge has never learned how to deal with them or investigate them. As she has more free time to consider them, she has no idea how to feel about these thoughts or even exactly how to articulate them. It seems that she has not had the opportunity to discuss these feelings at length with anybody during her formative years, and now she does not understand how to do so. She can feel that there is something more than what she has, but she is so unaware of the possibilities that she can barely even begin to fathom or articulate what she feels. She is so sheltered that she cannot form questions because she has never seen an example or processed a scenario where those questions would come up.
ReplyDelete2. I think that Mr. Bridge thinks he loves Mrs. Bridge and Mrs. Bridge thinks she loves her kids. However, I don’t think either off them have contemplated what love means to them. They have not defined for themselves what love is or what feelings and actions go along with it. When they say they love each other or love their kids, it might not be in the way that I think of love. The relationships that they have observed and based their lives off of likely were similar. People didn’t necessarily marry for love. They married because it was the thing to do. Without exposure to literature, media, or a relationship that exemplifies love, they may be classifying what they feel as love, even if it is not. However, I do think that this family has a connection. Mrs. Bridge cares about her kids. In the case of Douglass’s escape from “that big Peters guys”, even when she is overly worried about appearances, she stills says, “Well, thank heavens you’re safe at least”. She still cares about the wellbeing of her children and wants to connect with them. Just as she enjoys spending time with her husband and feels a connection with him as well. She is just unaware of the types of actions and conversations that would likely strengthen their relationships.
1. I think Mrs. Bridge was treated the same way (the way she treats Douglas) as a child and all through her life. Everything just was and nothing needed an explanation. I would imagine she asked or wondered the same things as a child but probably never got real answers. She was probably told things were supposed to be a certain way and that was that. Now she finds herself on the other side of the exact same exchange and she has no answers. To her, answering Douglas’ question, “why can't we touch the guest towels?”, was like answering “why is killing wrong”. I would find it hard to tell someone don't kill because it's wrong and have them ask me why it was wrong. If I had to level someone about that, I would be frustrated too –not driven to tears, but very frustrated-. The idea of guest towels being only for show and table manners were such norms that she doesn't have or feel the need to have reasons for why she insists upon them. What's interesting is that, she realizes that not using the guest towels doesn't make sense and when Douglas forces her to/puts her in a position where she has to think about why she insists on it, she can't handle it. She “felt herself unaccountably on the verge of tears” (25). She is obviously not thinking for herself and so many of her stances are not based on any sort of real reasoning or anything that she thought of herself. She probably wasn't always like this but she's been conditioned to not think for herself and accept things as they are for so long that she may not be able to change.
ReplyDelete2. I agree with Mira that Mrs. Bridge definitely thinks she loves her children because how could she not? It's unheard of to not love your children right? I think many, if not all the examples of family dynamics/relationships she has seen are very similar to the one between her and her children and of course every mother says that they love their children so she probably thinks that that's what loving your children looks like. I don't think that she hates her children but it's hard to say that she loves them without really being connected to them (which she really isn't). I also think similarly about Mr. Bridge because he does all the things he thinks shows that he loves Mrs. Bridge and the children but there is nothing else. I think he's more so doing what a type A dad was expected to do at the time because he grew up with the idea that this was what he was supposed to do rather than because he wants to show his love.
1. I think that Mrs. Bridge is more aware than we give her credit for. She perceives and she feels, as evidenced by her thoughts about life and marriage when she is home alone: “Mrs. Bridge understood now that she would never see very much of him. They had started off together to explore something that promised to be wonderful, and, of course, there had been wonderful times. And yet, thought Mrs. Bridge, why is it that we haven’t - that nothing has - that whatever we - ?” Here, she comes so close to really asking the fundamental questions of life, but she can’t quite bring herself to formulate the words. She understands what she is lacking, what she wants, but putting it into words would acknowledge its legitimacy, making it more real and more pressing. Either subconsciously or consciously, Mrs. Bridge is suppressing the questions that she is perceptive enough to know she should be asking, but too afraid to ask. I mean, she wouldn’t be feeling this lack of fulfillment if she were as simple-minded as we like to imagine her as being.
ReplyDelete2. I think that Mrs. Bridge loves her kids, but just has no clue how to relate to them. And to be fair, Ruth and Douglas are pretty far out there. The description of Ruth’s outfit is just downright bizarre: “one morning she appeared for breakfast in Mexican huaraches, Japanese silk pajamas with the sleeves rolled up - displaying a piece of adhesive tape where she had cut herself while shaving her forearms - blue horn-rimmed reading glasses, and for earrings a cluster of tiny golden bells that tinkled whenever she moved”(58). But there are plenty of odd children who have solid relationships with their parents, and what makes this possible is the willingness of the parent to step out of his or her comfort zone and try to understand. When Mrs. Bridge is faced with something unfamiliar, she shies away or just pretends not to notice. In fact, the only reason she displays any interest at all in Douglas’ tower idea is because that was viewed as good parenting: “Mrs. Bridge responded somewhat absently when he first told her of his project; then, because she knew children wanted their parents to be interested in what they were doing, she asked how big it was going to be”(59). Clearly, she feels like trying to relate to her children is more of an obligation than an enjoyment, which is why she feels so distanced from her children.
1) I think Mrs. Bridge is a product of her society. If she ever needs to cite a reason for her actions or beliefs, her go to explanation is essentially: “That was what everyone did.” From the guest towels, to attending auxiliary group meetings, to tearing down Douglas’ tower, she does everything in order to appease other people. Even when Douglas pressed her to explain her strict rules on table manners, which I originally thought was her personal passion, she only says “you eat the way Americans eat,” not the way she wants him to eat. Now, I don’t think she doesn't have the capability to think for herself. She's shown she's perfectly capable. The problem is not that she isn't capable of thinking and forming her own opinions, it's that she stopping herself from doing so because she be forced to confront the habits society has instilled in her. She doesn't want to go against the norm, but if she were to question everything, she'd have to. She'd realize she enjoys going to the park more than housewife auxiliary meetings. She'd realize she'd rather listen to music instead of going to have cocktails with Noel Johnson. She doesn't want to cause trouble for herself or anyone else, so she confirms instead of pursuing what would make her happy.
ReplyDelete2) I think a combination of pressure from her parents/society and conversations she had with Walter changed her mind. I think after her father died, she decided she would have to marry, and Walter was the best option to her. It's like how I don't like vegetables, but I know they're good for me so I eat asparagus because it tastes better than all the other vegetables. After her father died, she may have realized how hard it would be for a woman to make it on her own in the 1930’s. She decides he's no longer unremarkable after he talks to her about how successful he plans to be, which would line up with my reasoning. To answer your other question, I think Walter definitely loves her, and she knows it. The only reason he works so hard is for her and their children. But like Mrs. Bridge says, he is simply “incapable of the declaration (of love) she needed.” Rather than saying it aloud, he shows his love by working hard and providing for his family.
Great points about the toaster and Tobacco Road, Stuart.
ReplyDelete1. When I read Chapter 35 I wrote in my book "She does it!" meaning she finally does what SHE wants (not the first time—the Spanish lessons comes to mind, though not the vocabulary book)when she decides not to wear stockings for maybe the first time in her life. And "she considered herself in the mirror and shook her head at the sight, but went downstairs all the same" (77). This is such a contrast, deliberate I'm assuming, to her not looking at herself in the mirror at the country club; she is finally, deliberately, breaking convention in middle age. It doesn't last not surprisingly. To answer the question, I think it's a combination of reasons: being a society woman, having grown up in a conservative world (yet this doesn't stop Ruth from being bohemian in her dress, reacting to the very world her mother adheres to); her parents, again, sure, though how much I'm debating; but still, to use Nell's term today, there is some existential crisis here, a fear of disrupting the world, yet wanting to in some ways disrupt it (hence the stockings), for fear of what happens should she see beyond the mundane life she leads. Jaliwa's question from BoJack Horseman applies here: what would Mrs. Bridge write if she had to fill in the blank: "I am _______ and I want to ______." She's thinking about this question in her own way more and more as she considers the promises and expectations of her life that are not panning out, despite her doing everything she was supposed to do. Thus: "And yet, thought Mrs. Bridge, why is it that we haven't—that nothing has—that whatever we—?" Maybe the answers would be too terrifying; and thus her return again and again to the dull, deadening, boring safety of not thinking for herself.
2. The hundred dollar question. The simple answer for me is yes. She loves her husband and she loves her kids. Does Walter love her? Sigh: I don't know. We like him because he is action and no nonsense—he appears to have no existential crises, let alone existential questions. Yet he has stayed away from home for all these years, and it's not going to change. He's a mystery in this, and I think this goes beyond his providing for his family, especially since in his middle age, the family doesn't really need more stuff. Mrs. Bridge thinks he is "incapable of [giving] the kind of declaration she needed" (69). It would appear: but why is he? This takes us right back to Stuart's question about Mrs. Bridge: is he conditioned by his society to be this kind of man? Is he thinking for himself? What the hell is he thinking? She married a man who wanted to share his dreams with her. What happened? Mrs. Bridge is reflecting on this as she confronts her middle age: "all had slipped away without a trace, without a sound" (65). Is Walter wondering too? She doesn't know; we don't know. Does he know?
I think that Mrs. Bridge has squashed herself into the cookie cutter shape she feels society has defined for her. She does not fit in this role. She is too smart, too independent, too thoughtful to mindlessly take her kids to dance class and the dentist and sports practice and chat about frivolities over luncheons with other housewives. The life she is living is not the one she deserves. She is trapped, and this makes her desperate (subconsciously, I think). She has these moments, like when she almost cries over the guest towels or over Ruth’s earrings. She has the capacity to think for herself but she has prevented herself from doing so for so long that it is now habit to silence those thoughts that are not part of her cookie cutter persona. She does not want to be different, and this deep desire to not be an individual means that she cannot voice, cannot even fully form, the fundamental questions that she needs to be asking. She feels she must be happy in her marriage so she does not allow herself to question that happiness because that would be admitting fault, doubt, individuality.
ReplyDeleteI do not think that Mr. Bridge loves his wife. He is existing in his own limbo of work, work, work and nothing else just as she is in her limbo of housewife, kids, house, social event, etc. She wants to love him but there is nothing there. She does not know her kids very well, and this makes it difficult for her to truly love them. She loves the idea of them—a good housewife is supposed to love her children—but she does not love them as individual human beings. I don’t know why she married Walter Bridge. I don’t know if she knows, at least anymore. I think they loved one another, once upon a time, and maybe it was the passion of love that drew her to him and made her want to commit to spending the rest of her life with him. But it may also have been external pressure from her parents or from society, pressure to confrom, that made her get married.
1. I don’t really like saying that Mrs. Bridge is simply a product of her society because she seems so much more complex than that, but it would seem as though Mrs. Bridge herself doesn’t see this. She doesn’t see that she is capable of more than what is simply expected of her as a mother, a wife, and a woman of her time. I suppose, in a way, that does make her a “product” of her society in that she’s this shell, this mirror that reflects other people’s ideas of who she should be, only she’s not hallow. She has thoughts and opinions and a hunger for life and discovery. And maybe all these other housewives are like this, and maybe they aren’t, but maybe, just maybe, it doesn’t matter. Mrs. Bridge needs to stop looking to others for all the answers, but she mustn’t also look only within herself. All I mean is that we’ve seen her dip her toes in the waters of self-reflection, and all too soon she’s spiraling. It’s like when she’s trying to explain to Douglas why the tower ought to be taken down, and she realizes she can’t really argue with him because her rationales are not her own, therefore she can’t truly sell him on them. There’s nothing authentic or reasonable about the explanation she gives to Ruth about why she shouldn’t wear such showy clothing. All the rules and guidelines she’s built her and her children’s lives around when questioned further open, as a model house would, to a picture-perfect illusion of a home, but a house without memories, emotions, or stories, that’s no home—it’s a façade, or, to push it a touch further (perhaps a bit too far), a prison. So, yes, I think she has been conditioned by her society, but I think she’s starting to realize that this system, this society, it isn’t all there is to life—it can’t be, else she’ll always be waiting for something that will never come.
ReplyDelete2. I think that she once really did love her husband, and that once, he may have loved her too, but since that time, they’ve adapted. She’s become a seemingly ideal housewife, and he’s become the reliable bread-winner. The dynamic of their relationship has changed because of this change in identity. India became Mrs. Bridge. In class, we were talking about whether or not housewives could ever truly be happy, and at the time I was completely on board with this idea that some women can be happy in that life and others simply can’t, but then I spoke to my dad, and I changed my mind. I don’t think being a housewife is something any woman should build their lives around. To raise your children is one thing, but to make them your whole world is unhealthy. It may be lovely and fulfilling for those years when they need you, 13-16 if you’re lucky, but there comes a time when they outgrow you. Then what are you left with? I know this doesn’t really answer the question of why Mrs. Bridge never ever seemed all that in touch with her children, but I think, to some extent, it explains her desire to control a lot of trivial aspects of their lives and why she always fails. She has nothing to teach them. If her lessons were her own, if her lectures came from a place of experience and knowledge, then there would be much less of a push back, but Mrs. Bridge refuses to search within herself for some deeper meaning or purpose for all the rules she sets, and in that, she is undone.
1.Mrs. Bridge doesn't want to voice these questions. She doesn't want to have to examine her logic. She's afraid of what she might find when she tries to put her reasoning into words. If Douglas ever argues back, Mrs. Bridge will finally be forced to ask herself the questions she was never willing to ask but he is. She is afraid to ask Ruth if she's meeting a boy. But this is not because of some frightening and specific aspect of that question; she is afraid of what might be the answer. As long as she doesn't ask any such questions, she can keep up appearances, for herself if for no one else.
ReplyDelete2. Mrs. Bridge does love her kids, but less for who they are than simply because they are her children. This parental love can be good, but with her it brings certain expectations. She loves them as long as they do what her children are supposed to do, rather than loving them regardless of what all children will do. Mr. Bridge seems to genuinely love her, but he sees love in very material ways. He shows his love not through grandiose gestures but through hard work and price tags. He tries to give her the life he imagines she wants, never once thinking that he might actually play a role in it (other than The Provider). Neither of these loves is terribly healthy or satisfying. As a result, Mrs. Bridge, who views herself primarily as a wife and mother, does not feel satisfied.
Mrs. Bridge has a million questions but no one to ask them to, and no idea how to approach answering them on her own. Grace has many of the same questions as India, but she's seen as rather a strange person, and I don't think India could handle the kind of reputation that would come with asking them herself. Be the odd one out? Never. Unimaginable. Questions in general, I think, are unwelcome in this society. It wasn't Douglas' use of the guest towels that really got to Mrs. Bridge - it was the questions he asked that had her on the verge of tears. She has no good answers - nothing that would satisfy him, and nothing that could really answer the question being asked. It's just what's done; it's how it is. I think that not just Mrs. Bridge, but all the women here are painfully aware that they have no real answer for questions like this, and are consequently frightened and disturbed by them.
ReplyDeleteI'm under the impression that Mrs. Bridge is conditioned to love the IDEA of children rather than the children themselves, and struggles to reconcile this with her half-hearted love for the real people. (I say half-hearted only because I do not think she knows her children very well.) They aren't little robots and their minds are like sponges, but not ones that Mrs. Bridge gets to dictate - they do not absorb her lessons, but rather learn how to manipulate her lessons in order to get around unpleasant conversations or to explicitly bother her. She could very well love her children, but her society is telling her that they aren't what you should want your child to be, and that's messing with her head, "'Mrs. Bridge responded somewhat absently when [Douglas] first told her of his [tower]; then, because she knew children wanted their parents to be interested in what they were doing, she asked how big it was going to be." She doesn't know how to connect with her own children - her only method of mother-son interaction is doing what she's been told. Mrs. Bridge really doesn't know who her children are, or how to interact with them. She wants them to heed every word she says while simultaneously behaving like adults, "[Douglas] was vague, saying only that it was going to be the biggest tower anybody ever saw"59. Vague? What does she want from him - feet and inches? Her world is telling her how she should want her children to be, and because that doesn't match up with the reality of these three wonderfully strange people she's raising, it conflicts with the vague sense of familial love she has for them. Whether or not they love her is, I believe, another question altogether. As for Walter, I believe he loved her at the beginning of the marriage - or, at least, he loved being married - but the spark has gone, and I feel that that initial spark was the whole shebang. It's gone now, and Walter has a wife and children to provide for - exactly who his wife and children ARE doesn't seem important to him.
Ok -- like I just want to say these are really good blog questions. Anyways.
ReplyDelete1. I think before we answer such an important question, it is most definitely necessary to distinguish between root cause and proximate cause; because both contribute -- equally -- to her modes of thought. To see proximate cause, I think it is important to look at how Mrs. Bridge reacts to Ruth's outfit. While it seems to be a mild disagreement as Mrs. Bridge gets in a few jabs, saying Ruth would look like "something from another world," she is "suddenly very close to hysteria" (58). This is not the first time we have seen her on the verge of collapse: her walk down the hallway with the Van Metres also, clearly, exemplifies a latent emotional state that dominates her actions. While it is unclear what these emotions are, exactly, it is clear that they have an effect on how she acts: like when she refuses to call the teacher even though she knows something about the incident is wrong, when she refuses to confront Douglas, or can't bring herself to confront Mr. Bridge. There is nothing logical in her actions, simply, again, a latent emotional state that sabotages her will and ultimately makes her not act. She is not passive. She is conflicted. This latent emotional state, as I will continue to call it, is the proximate cause of her actions -- some of which are ultimately difficult for the reader to grasp. It is the same thing that makes her immediately answer questions that Mr. Bridge and even Douglas have the self control to think about before answering. However, the tougher concept to grasp is the root cause of her actions. What causes her to become so emotional, or so hysterical? While I dislike the use of that word following our reading of The Bell Jar, I think it fits here. She is constantly questioning, constantly on the verge of losing it. Especially as "the truth" remains and settles "upon her with ever greater finality" (65). Her life is reduced to exchanging gifts with Lulubelle Watts. She is so emotional she doesn't even try and understand a potential rationalization for Douglas' tower, and immediately resolves to destroy it. She even turns to church. Because we get so little insight into her emotions, however, it is hard to divine the ultimate cause of her issues. While her latent emotions do explain a couple of questions raised by Stuart, like why she has a hard time forming coherent questions, it does not answer who is to blame. Is it her, or society? Maybe its because I think about literally everything sociologically, but I think I would ultimately place more blame on society than I would on her. Taking a closer look at her decisions, or the ones that seem paralyzed by emotion at least, it seems clear that when emotion takes control it results in her not taking action. Every time. Her line of emotional thinking seems to be "would a proper housewife do this? would a sophisticated lawyer's wife do this? how a bout a newly-married?" And I think society gives her shockingly little personal agency. The most decisive action we see her taking is to call the firemen, which she only does because other housewives do -- ultimately, she is outsourcing her chore onto "real men" who can take care of the problem. Her lack of personal agency, her constant need for sophistication -- the one that is, I believe, the reason why she does not have a good relationship with her kids, ultimately stops her from making true decisions that are her own. When she is so focused on gravy, or guest towels, or what the neighbors think that she can't even bother to see the beauty of the tower, like the random neighbor guy Ewing does, or to bring Douglas closer instead of pushing him away, that's a problem. And I think that brings me into the second question:
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ReplyDelete2. Yes, I think Mr. Bridge loves her, its just a different kind of love than we're used to. He redoubles his efforts at the office instead of trying to stay at home more, but the book does say that he does that because he can sense they want more and I think we should take what the book says without reading too much into it -- because there isn't much conflicting evidence. Even towards the end of the reading tonight, we see the "astonishment" (69) on Mr. Bridge's face when asked if he loves Mrs. Bridge. Yes, I think there are definitely moments when he does snap at her, like the church, but they are both caught up in the search for sophistication -- he's constantly looking through travel brochures, still trying to up his game at work, getting wealthier and wealthier. He was embarrassed, but that was it. And I think Mrs. Bridge loves her children too. Deep down. I think Mrs. Bridge has been so coopted by the societal search for sophistication and a paralyzing lack of personal agency that she cannot function as a parent, but I think that there has to be some sort of unconditional love there. I think that's why there's an emotional conflict at all. Or why she's uncomfortable when confronted at the party about the real reason for Douglas' tower. Furthermore, I think she is paralyzed by wealth. She has everything she needs, and does NOTHING with her time -- that has to make someone go crazy. How do you write about ten years of life in a chapter? Harriet fills a lot of the role of mother in the household, taking care of a lot of the children' (and Mrs. Bridge's needs), and I think this does, in a way, rob her of a chance to get to know her kids. Just an ending thought, not really sure where it fits in with the rest of the question, but something tells me its most definitely relevant. Anyways.
ReplyDeleteMrs. Bridge knows there is something wrong in the way she is living her life. She realizes that she is feeling depressed, and she mentions that she is ashamed to admit that she feels like she has too much leisure time. Shame, fear, and being conditioned by the society she has lived in up until this point are the main reasons questioning her lifestyle and her world has been beyond her reach. Being unable to think critically about her own life stops her from having any thoughts towards her family members or world events that are not thoughts that she would be expected to have in her society. She doesn’t know herself so she can’t find the voice to think about the things that trouble her underneath the surface.
ReplyDeleteI’m pretty sure Mrs. Bridge loves her kids and her husband, but it is a kind of unconditional love that comes from living with people for years or giving birth to them. I’m not sure that she “likes” them for who they are and not what they are. For Mr. Bridge, I think it is similar, but probably even weaker than Mrs. Bridge’s love for their family. I think Mr. Bridge loves Mrs. Bridge but he is completely unable to articulate it when Mrs. Bridge asks him because saying it might be beyond his power. I am not sure if he knows he loves her or not. The supposed reason that Connell gives us for why Mr. Bridge spends nearly all his time at the office is because he is working to provide as best as he possibly can for his family,, but I’m wondering if we can trust Connell here. I am not entirely convinced that this is the reason Mr. Bridge spends so much time working because he doesn’t seem to know about or care about his family very much.
1. We did not really get to see Mrs. Bridge face these issue of sexism as a young adult because the book skips over that area of her life. I think that as a teen Mrs. Bridge probably acted similarly to her adult self. She probably avoided doing things that were unconventional. I imagine her conducting herself a bit like Carolyn if she was faced with a situation like the discussion Carolyn has with Jay. I think both Carolyn and Mrs. Bridge feels a gripping fear that, as a woman, they must act in a certain way. They also both seem to have an interest in their sexuality that they feel they can’t express because it would be improper. Ruth is a bit freer from conventions. I think she has natural curiosity, and she does not try to contain it as much as the other women do.
ReplyDelete2. Tarquin’s action are terrible but not that surprising. After his interactions with Douglas, it became clear that he was unstable. I don’t know if his actions were inevitable, but it seemed likely that he would act out in a violent manner. His parents supported and allowed his indecent tendencies. His parents seemed to stress individuality but to the detriment of beneficial characteristics. They seemed not to criticize him or explain to him when he did disrespectful or hurtful things. The Bridges do stress a lot of seemingly unimportant things in their parenting style, but I think that Mrs. Bridge has corrected away what we would think of as of Tarquin’s worst tendencies in her own children. She told her children not to do certain things because it might make them look bad, but in the process, she taught them how to be basically decent people. She may have used the wrong reasoning to get them there, but I think she taught them something that Tarquin’s parents did not teach him. This is what distinguishes the Ruth punching incident from the kind of intensely disturbing actions that Tarquin took against his parents.
3. This quote also confused me. In one way, I can see him being sort of proud or happy for Ruth. Even though she is not acting in the normal way, or in the way the family would have deemed acceptable, she is going out and finding her own future. As a parent, at least he can be happy that she is taking initiative and has some sort of goals of her own. Before she leaves, he tells her that she must behave herself out there in the world, and Ruth says she can take care of herself. I guess this makes him laugh because he is not worried about her conducting herself the way she sees fit, but he is more concerned with her acting in a way that is acceptable to society. But the quote seems to imply that he believes she can take care of herself. Even if she might act strangely, Mr. Bridge seems to have some faith in her.
1. I think she's unable to comprehend anything outside of her sheltered reality. It's as if she literally can't see what's going on if it doesn't fit within the guidelines of what she's been taught before. I think she's a result of her environment, but at the same time I'm curious as to whether or not this is true because of the emotions that overwhelm her at times when she seems to be almost at the brink of challenging everything that she's ever known. I think she definitely has the capacity but it's just whether or not she decides to ever acknowledge that. She seems perfectly capable of comprehending certain aspects of life, but with others she completely shuts down. For example, we see her fall apart over things like guest towels and we wonder whether or not she'll finally come to the realization that she's not entirely happy with the superficiality of her life. But then she dismisses these thoughts and moves on with her life not looking back at her episode. I feel like it's a matter of time until she comes to a conclusion because she can't keep going on like this.
ReplyDelete2. I think she married Mr. Bridge because that was the easy solution for what to do at that time. I think she was curious as to what life held other than marriage, family, children, etc. but I think the possibilities maybe were too overwhelming? I definitely think she loves Mr. Bridge, but I think she loves him moreso because she's supposed to and because that's what makes life easier. By loving and marrying Mr. Bridge, India is able to clearly see what the future will hold: marriage and children. There won't be any controversy, no one will look at her funny, it's just exactly what she's expected to do so it's a comfortable position to just fall into. This kind of lifestyle was supposed to be simple and safe and grant her control over her life because she'd be able to see so far ahead. But it's interesting seeing these aspects of her life not really come together as she'd hope because then it causes her to question her security and the choices she made, both of which are questions that aren't supposed to be asked for someone in her position.